My Cocaine Addicted Fiance Left Me After 5 Years to Get Married to a Heroine Addict? Does She Really Love Him?
Question by RiddleMeThis: My cocaine addicted fiance left me after 5 years to get married to a heroine addict? Does she really love him?
She’s been addicted to pain-killers for about 8 years and just recently got into smoke crack and heroine. She stole, lied, cheated, etc. We were supposed to be get married but since she was sick with her addiction, she was sent from NJ out to Colorado for rehab. Once she got out of detox, she checked herself out of rehab and texted me only to tell me that she doesn’t love me anymore and that she got married to another guy who she said has been clean for 6 months. As it turns out, she just met this guy not even 1 month prior and he’s a heavy heroine shooter of almost 15 years. He also smokes crack. She was so bitter and nasty to me and told me not to call her anymore and to leave her alone. A few days later, she gets a tattoo of his name on her and continues to smoke crack, heroine, etc. with him. They’re living in some motel out in Colorado. Could she really love this guy? Can she love at all at this point? Why is she so mean to me after all the great times that we shared?
Best answer:
Answer by mredsgal
It’s a hard fact to face, but some people can’t be saved from themselves. Misery loves company, and it seems she has found that. I am sorry for the loss of your fiance, but maybe it’s time to move on and find happiness for yourself.
Answer by Leslie the Lizard
Addiction is an illness, and usually has something to do with self-medicating some problematic issue or psychological problem; for example, a lot of people who were molested in childhood end up using drugs as do people who were abandoned by a parent. Those things devastated the person and they found that using drugs killed the pain, or at least distracted them from it. Many of these people suffer from self-loathing; they may feel that they caused whatever trauma happened to them or that they’ve let people down with their drug addiction, but rather than quit, they use more and more because they don’t want to face what they are doing. Never underestimate the hideous power of addiction; it’s a devastating and incredibly painful way of life. She probably sees you as being too good for her, so she’s chosen to give herself over to addiction completely and really kicked it up a few notches by marrying the heroin addict; getting clean from heroin is incredibly difficult. I’m sure she doesn’t actually love this guy but chose him because she thinks she deserves a loser like this, and the fact that he probably knows a lot of drug dealers is attractive to her as well. It’s so sad. She is in no shape to have any normal emotions or behaviors. Watch that show “Intervention” on A&E and you’ll get the gist of what it’s like to be an addict and to be the person who loves an addict. She’s mean to you because you represent a healthy lifestyle, and she is giving herself over to her addictions and doesn’t want anyone or anything to shake her determination to go down that road. Relapse unfortunately is part of the process of getting sober, so hopefully she will realize she needs rehab again and will go back. In the meantime, you need to get on with your life. She’s married now so you should consider yourself out of her life; start dating serious girls who are going to college or who have good careeers and above all, have good values.. Best wishes to you and I am so sorry you had to go through this harrowing situation. It WILL get better for you, I promise.
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